Stress

Ianya stress bila tau satu UK tau pasal kes pindah hall. Cakap la apa korang sume nak cakap yang pasti bukan korang yang mengalaminya.

Somehow aku harap aku pilih untuk pergi ke Sheffield...bukan di sini...kerana life di sini memang tak seindah yang digambarkan....

Pengalaman kita berlainan...jadi alangkah baik jika pendapat kalian disimpan sendiri tanpa menyuarakannya kepada saya andai kalian tau pendapat kalian itu sangat mengguris hati saya. Bukankah nabi menggalakkan diam andai diam itu lebih baik?

Saling melengkapi

Lengkap hidup hari ni...

Dihiasi perkara suka duka...

Pagi hari sampai ke malam tersenyum sendirian melihat keindahan ciptaan Allah...bumi London dituruni salji sejak awal pagi...mungkin kerana pertama kali melihatnya.

Tapi begitu mudah nikmat ditarik...setibanya di bilik, diri ini mendapat satu berita sedih dan tidak dijangkakan. Sesuatu yang membuatkan diri merasa usaha sia-sia begitu sahaja..merasakan diri ini banyak kurangnya..sesuatu yang sekali lagi mempunahkan keyakinan yang sedia ada rapuh. Sedih...tapi tak tahu pada siapa harus diluahkan...seperti biasa, diri mencari ketenangan dari Ilahi. Mungkin usaha duniawi sudah cukup...fizikal dan mental...tapi bagaimana usaha rohani? Mungkin kurang di situ...perlu muhasabah dan cari di mana silapnya...

Ya Rabb, bimbing hambaMu dalam menghadapi hari mendatang

Jatuh Lagi

Er...bukan jatuh apa...tapi jatuh sangap lagi

kali ni dekat Nicholas Saputra...suka tengok dia dalam filem Ada Apa Dengan Cinta....tu je...lain-lain tak...eh jap dengan dalam klip video Debaran Cinta....

Saya tak sepatutnya sangap malam ni sebab esok saya ada test math...wargh...revision belum abis lagi...next week ada test lagi....next next week pun ada test lagi...bosannya...tapi takpe, cuti winter bakal menjelang....so dalam kesangapan ni, Ganbatte Dalila :)

Senja Berulang Rindu

Tak tau kenapa malam ni hanya ada mood nak dengar lagu-lagu melayu yang lama. Aku lantas teringat pada lagu Allahyarham Sudirman yang bertajuk Senja Berulang Senja atau dikenali juga dengan tajuk Rindu, yang merupakan lagunya yang paling aku suka.

Teringat saat di mana mama, aku dan adik-beradikku yang lain menemani ayahku kerja. Balik dalam pukul 12 malam macam tu, ayah pasang cd lagu Sudirman, sampai track 15 aku suka ulang sebab lagu tu lagu kesukaan. Kakak dan adik suka juga kat lagu pelangi petang dan milik siapakah gadis ini. Lagu-lagu ni betul-betul nostalgia, mengingatkan aku kepada ayahku yang penat bertungkus lumus kerja bagi mencari rezeki untuk membiayai pelajaran kami adik-beradik. Somehow aku rindu untuk menemani ayahku.

Aku teringat ada sekali tu aku rasa sangat penat sebab baru balik dari mengikuti program mendaki Gunung Ledang tapi bila ayah ajak teman dia pergi buat research kat UM, aku tak sampai hati nak tolak. Aku rasa kasihan kat ayah, lalu aku ikut je. Dan memandangkan aku sorang je yang ikut time tu, ayah sangat sweet. Buatkan aku kopi pagi-pagi, ajak aku sarapan di restoran walaupun bukan restoran lima bintang tapi bila ayah yang order dan aku hanya duduk je, aku dah rasa macam lebih dari lima bintang. Kalau ikut ayah pergi kerja, pasti ayah akan belanja macam-macam.

Hari ni hari lahir ayah. Bila angah tanya ayah nak hadiah apa dari UK ni, ayah kata ayah hanya nak angah berjaya. Ayah,Angah akan berusaha untuk realisasikan impian ayah. Angah janji takkan hampakan harapan ayah. Angah akan selalu ingat yang ilmu pelajaran tu adalah harta paling berharga. Angah nak jadi hebat macam ayah. Ayah doakan angah berjaya ye. Angah sayang Ayah...Ayah lah ayah terbaik kat dunia ni. Terima kasih ayah sebab didik angah, along adik sampai jadi manusia berguna so far. Terima kasih atas segala yang kami terima selama ini. Hanya Allah yang dapat balas semua jasa ayah. Angah doakan ayah berjaya dunia akhirat, dirahmati dan dilindungi Allah selalu, dimurahkan rezeki dan ditempatkan bersama orang beriman di syurga kelak. SAYANG AYAH

Never Give Up

 

Touched

New hopes

New dreams

New ways

Never give up

Here In UK

It has been a while since I last updated my blog.But I don't think it matters because it just has a few readers.

The entry I posted before were written in Malaysia, and now it seems everything's happening too fast that I'm now in London, studying in Imperial College London, pursuing a degree in Biomedical Engineering and yet still struggling to improve my English.

Yeah, despite the fact that I already have a very tight schedule- 9am to 6pm - I take up English classes to help me to be more fluent in speaking and writing, which is on every Thursday ends at 8pm. I just hope that it's gonna be worthwhile. I like the teacher, very helpful and supportive. I remembered there was a time when I got almost all corrects for my grammar-preposition-fill-in-the-blank questions and he said to me "you sure can do it while you close your eyes, huh?". He even said that he should put me in other group since he saw me completed the exercise that he gave us. Well I guess if I want to improve myself, I am the one who should put lots of effort to realise it.

I think nothing much to say about London because I myself haven't been to many places in London yet. Why? Well I guess the answer is that because I don't really have friends to accompany me to go sightseeing. I admit that I'm not good at making friends and to make it worst, I am the only malay girl in my batch who's studying in ICL. Nothing to boast about. I am still holding tight to my faith that there's a blessing in disguise. Lots of questions are playing in my mind such as why am I destined to be alone here in London when in fact I'm not that good in socializing, why am I destined to have a roommate who doesn't have any religion when in fact I myself do not have a good understanding in my religion, why am I destined to be in Imperial when in fact I'm not that intelligent?

My sister told me to let this moment to define me of who I am and for me to discover my inner strength, but as days passed by, I still haven't discover anything. I find myself boring, what even to know what others think about me. I refuse to go to most of the events because I think I have no one close to me for me to go with. Plus, I am worried sick about my English. Can you imagine someone who is not good at socializing being stuck in the middle of the crowd with her bad English? How I hope my sister is here with me but then if she is, I will never learn how to be independent.

Yeah so I can say that everything is like a whole new experience to me, be it enjoyable or depressing. I hope it can make me a stronger and better person in future. Wishing myself the best of luck, I would like to quote on several lines from two songs- Stand by rascal Flatts and Beautiful Day by India Arie

Beautiful Day by India Arie

Life is a journey

Not a destination

There are no mistakes

Just chances we've taken

Lay down all your regrets because all we have is now

Wake up in the morning

and get out of bed

Start making a mental list in my head

Of all the things that I am grateful for

Early in the morning

It's the dawn of a new day

New hopes, new dreams, new ways

I open up my eyes and

I open up my mind and

I wonder how life will surprise me today

I'm gonna do my part and

Make this a positively beautiful day

Life is a challenge not a competition

You can still smell the roses and be on the mission

Just take a moment to get in touch with your heart

Sometimes you feel like you've got something to prove

remind yourself that there's only one you

Just take a moment to give thanks for who you are

 

Stand by Rascall Flatts

You feel like a candle in a hurricane

Just like a picture in a broken frame

Alone and helpless

Like you've lost your fight

But you'll be alright

'Cause when push comes to shove

You taste what you're made of

You might bend till you break

'Cause it's all you can take

On your knees you look up

Decide you've had enough

You get mad you get strong

Wipe your hands shake it off

Then you stand

Life's like a novel

With the end ripped out

The edge of a canyon

With only one way down

Take what you're given before it's gone

Start holding on

Keep holding on

Everytime you get up

And get back in the race

One more small piece of you

Starts to fall into place